2012 Why The Chicken Crossed The Road Jokes

From http://www.yooohaaa.com
2012 Political and Election WHY did the chicken cross the road
...and other chicken cross the road jokes as well at the end
have fun...send to your friends

BARACK OBAMA:  "At first The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change! But then, the chicken crossed the road because the change just wasn't all it was hoped for." 

Michelle Obama "My chicken crossed the road for better nutrition ...and to get away from my husbands singing"

Mitt Romney "Decided to cross the road, then changed my mind, and was wearing  flip flops.  Why would you say that's ironic ? On the other side was a guy who was poor, but the chicken wasn't worried about him"

Donald Trump - "To get to the guy with proof that O'bama wasn't born in the USA."
 

Newt Gingrich - "The chicken, who was married at the time, crossed the road to get to the other woman on the other side with hope that his chicken wife back on the original side would think that an open chicken marriage would be OK." 
 

John Boehner "The chicken can't cross the road until it overcomes these emotions and quits crying."

Rick Santorum - "To prove that if it can get to the other side, climate change is a conspiracy."

Ron Paul - "There just isn't enough money to cross the road.  We're Broke !"

Rick Perry - "To get to ...to get to ..wait ..it will come to me ...oops" 

Michelle Bachman - "To accept the award for the Who's The Biggest Nut contest"

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me. 

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken? 

 AL GORE: I invented the chicken. 

 

 JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. 

 GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is e ither for us or against us. There is no middle road here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

 

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road. 

 

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

 

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and tak e falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty ! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

 

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I've not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

 

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

 

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

 

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

 

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2012, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2012. This new platform is much more stable and will never reboot.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

 

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one???